Think about it...

This evening as I cruised around on Facebook I noticed a friend's status that read, "someone complained to Voltaire that life was hard. He replied compared to what?" - War Games by Linda Poleman..... Think about it" (thanks Mike). I immediately replied that it was easier to live for a cause than to die for one, which got me thinking. The message that we often get from movies and music is that the true demonstration of love is to die for someone. There are countless songs in which the singer claims that he would die for his true love, countless movies in which couples sacrifice themselves for love of the other person. We often see such examples and say, "wow that person really loved", or, "how romantic!" Unfortunately, I think that what we are seeing in such examples is base cowardice, immaturity, and fatalistic idealism.


As mortals we put a lot of emphasis on our mortality. The thought of dying is terrifying to most, even those who have some belief in an afterlife are still periodically beset with fear or doubt, the reality is, we can have faith, but we don't have 100% guaranteed certainty of everything working out. Therefore, it would seem that overcoming that fear and uncertainty, willing to risk everything and possibly throw away the only shot at life we have for the sake of someone else is a huge sacrifice. I think this is quite probably one of the greatest lies our society has fallen for; the idea that it is harder to die than to live. 


We are all alive. We all know the cost of living, what it takes to have relationships with people, to maintain health, to struggle financially, spiritually, emotionally, etc. yet Christ calls us to pick up our cross daily and follow him. Wait a minute, what is our cross you may ask? I suggest that it is all of those above mentioned burdens, knowingly shouldering all of that potential pain and suffering, approaching it willingly and even cheerfully, daily. In the context of a romantic relationship this means living for the other person day by day, working to make the relationship stronger, accepting the struggles and hardships and sacrificing yourself every single day for the benefit of the other person. Personal rights get put aside in the interest of the best possible well-being of the other.


Some of you may be thinking, wait a minute, you mentioned picking up a cross, and that Christ guy, did he not sacrifice his very life for his bride, the Church? Yes, he surely did. So then what is so cowardly or lesser about being willing to give up your life in one great act that proves your love for the beloved? Simply this, Christ is Risen! Jesus lived from all eternity in communion with the Trinity. He forsook that to be incarnated as a man and he lived with us for years, daily laying aside his authority and rights as Creator of the universe, as is written in Philippians 2:6-8, "Though he was God, he did not think of equality with God as something to cling to. Instead, he gave up his divine privileges; he took the humble position of a slave and was born as a human being. When he appeared in human form, he humbled himself in obedience to God and died a criminal's death on a cross." Jesus started his sacrifice long before the moment of the crucifixion. He put up with living in a lowly human body, associated with sinners and prostitutes and showed love every day to those who would later applaud his death. When he died it was not as a cheap alternative to living out a life of sacrificial love, it was the culmination of a life of sacrificial love. And Christ has risen, he is alive and continues to live, showering his bride with love, constantly forgiving the many transgressions of his bride the Church, in order that he may present us blameless to his Father in Heaven.


So yes, while throwing one's life away in an all out moment of passion, allegedly proving one's love for another may appear flashy and extravagant, it pales in comparison to a life lived in sacrificial love, devoted to one's partner. In Ephesians chapter 5 we are given guidelines as to how to live as husband and wife, I believe that what this text is saying is that we are called to live a life of sacrificial love. Women are called to submit, i.e., lay aside their own rights and desires, and men are called to sacrifice, just as Christ sacrificed, living a life of sacrificial love with the willingness to give it all, not as a first option, but as a culmination.


I hope that when looking for a way to express your love, you would realize that the most meaningful way in which you could do so, is to lay down your life, by living.